I see it now I’m my own worst enemy

Gotta question if my closest really frenemies

Going crazy, insane, fault of the anxious brain

I make up for it but fail to conceal the pain

Can’t ever do or be enough, yea my bar’s high

Afraid to pull-up, because limits don’t define the why’s

Self sedation just to snooze on my troubles

Alarms open my eyes, they’ve magnified and doubled

All the double standards, others versus me

Emotional reasoning births false catastrophe

But I should challenge it right?

It’s like a challenge to fight, all the negativity to find the inner me

Feeling fraudulent with no brain, not as smart as they claim,

Numerical marks were  my claim to fame

Progress, no longer quantifiable

Got me thinking my come up is partially deniable

Used to streaks of luck, but hardships are getting back

Impatiently waiting for the day it all gets snatched away

Do whatever I can just to try and deal

Rolling over and up, to hide the way I feel

Life is passing me by, as the clock ticks

As I endlessly battle my mental, the David Blaine of tricks